I love the direction my life is moving. For the last ten years I have been on a self discovery process after my relationship of 27 years with my husband died. I was 13 when I met him.
At the age of 40 I realized that I had no idea of who I was, what I wanted and had no sense of self. My previous life was all about my husband, my kids and my job at the phone company. I followed the rules, did what everyone suggested that I do. I was a good girl. When everything collapsed I was left attempting to pick up the pieces on my own with two teenage boys, a job that was pushing me out the door and low self esteem. After working several jobs and getting farther behind, I stepped into the world of Entrepreneurship. I heard that it is a self development process with high compensation attached. There was a lot of resistance from my family and friends with my choice. I had a lot of work ahead of me to transition into the woman that I wanted to be. I have also heard that you attract who you are emotionally. Since I was a woman who liked to serve, I would find guys who needed a lot of help and it helped me determine that I was on the same emotional level. I decided to step back and work on myself. I have not been in a real relationship with a man for several years. My life was better as a single woman than adding a man who would not add value to my life. Of course I thought of the type of guy that I would like to have, I even wrote it on paper. A kindred spirit, someone who loves God, who wants to serve others, who has a great sense of humor, who was in business and understood what that was like, someone who is encouraging and supportive, who loves family, is stable financially and strong emotionally. I had a very long list. I had read the list to my mom one time years ago. She said” I know who that is” I said” What and you have not introduced me” She laughed and said ” Yes it is Jesus Christ” Again it was a very long list.
Once again this process of idealization, visualization, earnest Desire will bring about Confident Expectation, and this in turn must be reinforced by Firm Demand. I turn 50 next year. Life was not meant to be solo, even the animals in the ark came 2 by 2. One of my smart goals is to have a happy love life on or before 06/17. I received an email through an online dating sight from a man in the United States, I responded thanks for the email (always courteous) however I barely have time for a coffee with someone who is local. He responded that we was moving to Vancouver BC and that is why he is connecting with me. (Old blueprint, sure you are) I decided to take a risk, and we have been communicating ever since. We have connected on so many levels. We talk and text every day. He has all of the attributes that I am looking for and more. Our marriages were very similar and our life goals. He worked his business first and then had a family. I had a family and now focused on business. I have not been this excited in many years and he is flying to Vancouver this Monday. We have scheduled our first date. So grateful. Life will give you what you ask for, most of us do not ask for enough.